What'd you get for Christmas little Amy?

LOL.
Nothing.


I bought 4 t-shirts online. They were 5$ each. Part of a Threadless sale.

That's what I found under the Christmas tree this morning. (That's a lie. We don't have a Christmas tree. They were on my desk.)


My mom even went through the trouble of splitting the 4 t-shirts into two bags!


edit: they're really sweet shirts though. If you ever end up buying things from there. Use my link http://www.threadless.com?streetteam=AmyGriffs because I get store credit if you do! :)

I get so unbelievably frustrated from writing essays. I can't fucking do it. I can't write because there are no words in my fucking head.

Every single time I have an essay due, I put it off until the last fucking day and I can't do it. I tried writing my essay on sunday, when I had no power, and nothing to distract me

but...

I sat in front of the computer screen for 3 FUCKING hours, unable to write a single fucking thing. I watched my computer's battery slowly dwindle down, unable to write a single fucking thing, for 3 FUCKING hours.

It's like
I JUST DONT KNOW WHAT TO WRITE NEXT. Or how I can go about saying something. or anything at all. I don't know how to say stuff at all in a way that isn't my everyday moronic American babble. At least I KNOW I'm a fucking stupid American though.

and now I'm freaking out because I have to get it done. And I can't. And I REALLY don't want to ask my mom for help because, she won't be able to help me. She'll just fucking go through her library of books to try to find me one that might help, because she's fucking crazy. My mother borders mentally insane.

I feel so goddamn stupid. Every fucking retard in my class can write an essay. You aren't supposed to have to even work on the writing outside of class. Theres time in class to write the essays. And every fucking moron in my class has no problem just writing an essay. but I CANT FUCKING DO IT.

After I get an idea, when I start writing, I write random sentences that don't fit together. I write turds that come out of my head. So at the end, I have a messed up rich text document full of shit that doesn't correlate and confusing fragments that I can't make into sentences.

I'm going to fail this class anyways. The only class I will have failed. Writing for college. A fucking elective. Because I can't fucking control myself not to have panic attacks over writing.


there are no fucking words in my head

I can't talk because I don't understand anything

I cant speak because I dont know what to say or how to formulate sentences

there are no fucking words in my head and its driving me insane

5 o' clock on Friday morning I heard a big bang right outside my window and my power went out. It was too cold to get up and look outside so I stayed in my bed while my parents ran around the house and checked on the status of the house and whatnot. Apparently a huge tree limb fell and ripped the wires right out of my house. We called the electric company or the police or whatever and told them but the whole town was calling them too because HOLY SHIT my town looks like a war zone right now. What, with there being wires and trees on every side street.

I didn't have school that morning. I wouldn't have gone even if we did have school, because why in the bloody hell would I want to get ready for school in the freezing cold with no electricity? My mom tried getting me up though and at least finding out if we had school. I just went back to sleep.

When I woke up it was freezing in my house. We had no electricity, heat, or hot water. D: So I went to my neighbors to see if they had anything either. They had a generator and a pellet stove so it was warm in there but they didn't have any electricity either. They were bitching because the reason they didn't have electricity was because the “pine queen” next door refused to cut down any of the trees leaning towards their house.

Because of the MASSIVE town outage though, I didn't have school for a couple of days! YAY! and since I'm a senior I'm not going to have to make up those snow-days at the end of the year. I get out of school in may! :D

Not having electricity wasn't all that bad. I caught up on some things I needed to do and read some good books. Plus, candlelight is fun.

I got my electricity back today though. and tomorrow I have school.